Sisters

Since a very long time ago, I promised myself to never write when I was sad and down. I felt like emotions are passing and fleeting and I don't want to be known for a passionately down moment.

I know I've since broken that rule. Realizing that life is made up of positives and negatives, and when they're all combined, it can be very beautiful.

With that, I write with a bit of sadness and heavy heart. 

Last week, we packed up and drove to Three Lakes, Wisconsin to visit my sister, her husband and four kids. I thought that my heart was prepared, knowing that they're moving far away, for the emotions that would stir.

It hit me hard though, our first night there. Tears just rolled.

My sister and her family moving so far.

It was hard for me to watch the kids play together at times, not knowing when the next time would be.

Of course, as sisters, we still snickered at the naughtiness and told each other stories of appalling things that our kids do and say.

In my mind I thought so much about our own childhood. All the time we spent playing together and as we got older the time we spend hanging out together.
I don't think that their is any way to put into words what my sister means to me.
We ebb and flow in our relationship as most friends do, but she will always be my sister. That connection is so binding.

We inspire each other in different ways, make business plans that we'll never fulfill, and talk style, children, and anything that comes to mind.
The long drive currently has distanced us currently, but there won't be any more phone calls like "wanna meet halfway at mom and dad's this weekend".
That's the part that gets me.

My nieces and nephews are so young, they change so fast. What if I miss it?
What if my kids are too young to have the memories of their cousins?

We'll make new ones, I know. The when factor is what's a question mark.
I cherish that family though.
Kinda like you wouldn't believe.
Which is why it makes sense why my heart hurts so much.

I love you like crazy Lindsay.
Can't tell you enough how much I'll miss you.