Maybe

Maybe it's not normal to spend your free time sledding your kids down a dinky snow embankment

maybe it's not normal for a four year old to sled with a bloody nose

maybe it's not normal to play Candy Land morning and night

and maybe it's not normal for a two year old boy to love truck shirts, nail polish, and a fox.

Maybe it's not normal to never let your kids watch tv, and paint their nails instead

maybe it's not normal to play games and get into it

maybe none of it is normal. Maybe.

But maybe I'm giving motherhood my everything, my all, maybe then it's all worth it.

A little pet peeve

As a mom, 

I feel bad saying I have pet peeves.

But I do.

There's one that gets me

more than others:

Meal times.

 Breakfast.

Lunch.

and Dinner.

 So, in order to keep

my life moving in

the right direction,

I'm trying to change.

 To see a meal time how they do.

To keep my cool.

To enjoy every minute of it.

 One day last week,

when I thought of this plan,

I grabbed my camera.

Captured them for who they are.

 Two little ones acting their age, 

forsaking manners,

and mostly loving life.

My little pet peeve

has turned into a little

life project.

Not for them,

for me.

I'd say it's working.

They're fun and cute,

especially at meal times.

Faithful

I wrote this post several weeks ago, but never published it. I can't believe the situations that God works in, so. beautiful. He's answered my prayer in terms of my health and healing. He didn't answer in the way that I wanted, but He answered. He is so faithful. We've since finished reading the book mentioned below, and it's my favorite, not only for my kids, but for me.

*

Every day, me, Eden, and Micah, sit down on the couch and pull a blanket across all three of our laps. We open up one of the fifty books we check out weekly from the library, and we sit and read and read. Every few days, we pull out a new favorite, The Story for Children.

I was shocked at the theme as we read yesterday, mostly from Exodus. The theme, over and over and over, God is faithful, God is faithful, God is faithful.

See, I've been down lately. My body just isn't recovering from this whole miscarriage ordeal, and I've been discouraged at the amount of time that's past. I'm sensitive too. I love friends talking about babies, hearing about babies, anything to do with babies, but I cry. Really easily. It's a little piece of my heart that is so tender and sensitive.
As Eden, Micah, and I have been reading, that theme of 'God is faithful', has been beautifully haunting me. Like when God promised Abraham and Sarah a child, and they waited 40 years; or when the Israelites waited outside the promised land, waited for 40 years outside of it in the desert. He was there, and he continually provided for His people. It wasn't always in ways they expected, but He was so faithful to them.
Often when I read the Bible, I look for a promise, a statement of hope, or perhaps some word of encouragement. Never do I look to the stories of the Old Testament, and yet, it's there.

I've been listening to the song "In Christ Alone" on repeat. The words:
In Christ alone my hope is found
He is my light, my strength, my song
This Cornerstone, this solid ground
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm

What heights of love, what depths of peace
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease
My Comforter, my All in All
Here in the love of Christ I stand

In Christ alone, who took on flesh
Fullness of God in helpless Babe
This gift of love and righteousness
Scorned by the ones He came to save

Til on that cross as Jesus died
The wrath of God was satisfied
For every sin on Him was laid
Here in the death of Christ I live, I live

There in the ground His body lay
Light of the world by darkness slain
Then bursting forth in glorious Day
Up from the grave He rose again

And as He stands in victory
Sins curse has lost its grip on me
For I am His and He is mine
Bought with the precious blood of Christ

No guilt in life, no fear in death
This is the power of Christ in me
From a life?s first cry to final breath
Jesus commands my destiny

No power of hell, no scheme of man
Could ever pluck me from His hand
Til He returns or calls me home
Here in the power of Christ I stand

What I wore Wednesday

Hooray for getting dressed today and linking up with Pleated Poppy!

I have a good excuse though for not getting dressed since... Friday.

When I take the time to get ready, I feel great about myself.

On Monday, the kids and I made cookies. I kept thinking how nice it would be to take some to the neighbors, but I looked so sloppy and frumpy, and ultimately missed out on being a blessing. 

Boo to that.

Cheers to today:

 top: Marshall's (of course)

pants: Free People

belt: Fossil

shoes: Blowfish

earrings: Kohl's (they're in my top five) (the earrings, not Kohl's)

And while I spent my two minutes of free time on my pictures, Eden and Micah gave each other ATV rides. I'm not sure if I should feel sorry for them or be proud they're creative. Maybe I'll think both.

For moms like me

I read a lot a blogs, at least, I think I do. It seems like most moms have been doing valentine crafts for weeks, decorating their house, and celebrating a little sooner than I have.

So, for moms like me, who haven't done a thing yet, here's a little valentine craft for your littles, and to kill two birds with one stone, a little decor at the same time. I found this on this blog, one of the many that I love.

 While Eden and Micah were playing at the table, I got out three pieces of double sided construction paper. Fancy, right? And I just cut as many hearts as I could.

 Get some wax paper, construction paper and glue, and you're almost done prepping. Told you this was easy.

Cut two big heart outlines out of your paper and glue them onto a sheet of wax paper.

 Give your little people their glue and let them share their little bowl of cut out hearts and craft to their little hearts content.

Cut out your heart from the wax paper, and tah-dah, you have yourself a little valentine decor. Plus your little people will feel accomplished and creative.

*

On a more serious note, it's been quite the week. I had an ultrasound Thursday evening followed by a call from the doctor right after to prepare to have surgery on Friday. My hormone numbers went up last week, which prompted the ultrasound, and found a molar pregnancy. To say I'm devastated would be an understatement. I began the grieving process all over again, my hopes dashed again, and I've been on my knees more in the past four days than I think I have been in my life.

There's a lot of unanswered questions at this point and only time will answer them. I never in a million years thought that this chapter in my life would be so long, let alone written. Yesterday I felt like I had a renewed hope, a few findings in my internet research that could be a little joyful if true. Time will tell.

For now, it's the little things and the three people in my life that I've been blessed with. Smiling when Eden says "wormaid" for mermaid and Micah yells "MEDIC" whenever he gets hurt. And yeah, Mike surprised me with an ipad last week when all this went down. Don't be jealous. I am blessed.

Ta. Ta. Ta. Tuesday

pardon my title

eden and I have been working on phonics

so it's just sort of how my brain works right now

it's tuesday

duh

of course

and it's a quiet day at home

and my heart is full

and grateful

 grateful for a lot

my dad had surgery today

he's good

that makes me really happy

so does Micah's belly in the above pic

and his socks

and her

that outfit

 she's so creative in play

that makes me really happy too

like here

what is she thinking about

I love those thoughts that bring a smile to my face as I'm looking over pictures

 I didn't have to pick any cookie crisp off of door frames

I've done that you know

in days past

not today

that makes me happy

 I sent out four little snail mail letters today

who doesn't love mail

which reminds me

it's time my kids both got a little note under their pillow

they love it and their smile is contagious when I do it

it's almost like rewarding myself

 I ordered some exercise dvd's today

that makes me smile

almost like I'm making fun of myself

but it looks good

Physique 57

hmmmm 

I'll let you know what happens

have fu. fu. fu. fun today

because it's ta. ta. ta. tuesday

hug your babies

count your blessings

(even if their little bellies and mismatched socks)