Kindness: A form of blessing

Dear Eden and Micah,
I was debating about sharing me and daddy's love story today on this blog. After all, this is a memory keeper for you, but I know I'll never forget the details of it. The thoughts that I have right now, I'm scared will be gone in a matter of hours. Anxious thoughts, that's probably the best way to describe them.
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We just got back a little bit ago from the zoo. You guys were a blast. You giggled, belly laughed, and smiled at silly things the animals did and I loved watching the amazement in your eyes when the cheetah came right up to the glass window. Eden, you were slightly disappointed when the tapir was sleeping, and Micah, you and I were totally on the same page when we were watching the lions, their magnificence awesome and humbling at the same time.

We didn't stay long, we came to see a handful of animals and emptied our snack bag. We'll go back soon, I promise. Eden, you already requested the polar bear and octopus, it'll happen soon.

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Shoveling the snow in our driveway yesterday prompted talks of penguins and initiated the visit to the zoo today. I had a couple of soon-to-expire coupons at the mall just up the road, so we stopped. I told you that it'd be short and we'd be on our merry way.
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We walked in and I saw a familiar homeless man. I find writing that to be both embarrassing and ironic at the same time. Embarrassing because I'm going in a mall to buy something, probably something I can live without and ironic because that homeless man made me think about it.
There's so much in this life that we can do without. I was just telling you both earlier last week "to whom much is given, much is required". Your daddy and I speak freely with you both about the children we sponsor. We pray for them as a family and we often try to imagine their life, unlike ours, with much need. I know that you both are little and you don't understand it yet, but I pray that God gives you a heart for the needy.
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The homeless man waved at both of you as we walked in, and Eden, you were so intrigued by him. Perhaps it's a similar obsession to beasts and wolves, you're always drawn to the different side of the story.

Micah, you did your bashful smile, where you lower your little double chin closer to your chest. It's charming to say the least.

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We went into our two stores and were done, just like I promised, quick. We walked back past the homeless man and I stopped. I wanted to do something, say something, but it all seemed so insignificant and pathetic. Here I am, shopping, while someone is sitting in front of me, homeless and hungry. The angel on my right shoulder had me thinking of even the bigger picture, the giant need and our reckless spending. The devil on my left brought to mind, me, my family, my husband, all striving to make a better life for us, the selfish aspect of course.
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He told you, Eden and Micah, to "be good" and my trance of thoughts stopped. I started heading for the doors and asked you Eden, if you thought he was hungry. You did. Immediately, we picked up a little lunch from Panera and headed straight back to where he was sitting. He was still there and my heart was full. I asked him if he was hungry, he shrugged a little, and said "if you don't mind". I handed him the little bag of food.
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We walked out and I couldn't hold back my tears. I felt really pathetic, because I feel like that's nothing. Nothing in comparison to what I could've done. But at the same time, I was happy. Happy that a good intention was followed through and that I, maybe, was a teeny tiny blessing.
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I got to the car and cried. We talked, well I talked, the whole way home about how kindness is like giving someone a little love straight from your heart. How it can be small, non-material, but make a huge difference in someone's life. The small things are often what I remember about people. When people show you two kindness, it melts me. It makes me want to tackle that person with a bear hug and tell them that they've just made my day, week, and month. Don't ever underestimate kindness, it's huge.
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I hope that you both remember all the little things in life, and that you recognize blessings when you see them. Teaching you these things is my job, and I'm not always good at it, but I hope you know my heart. Eden and Micah, your kindness is an extension of your love and hopefully one day, your love for God. I love you both so much and loved all the beautiful memories we made in only a few hours, and I hope between the three of us, they're never forgotten.
Love,
Mommy